Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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