My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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