i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize