We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
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