Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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