Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
