just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
