whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
