ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
