dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
