He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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