Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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