Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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