walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
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