Porn is love you can see.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
