People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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