how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
