I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
