You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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