margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
We're not piercing ourselves today.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
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