i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
