I'm lost and stupid without you.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I would fuck him just for his dog
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