I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
