thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize