I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
A+ Viking dick
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
