I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
