There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
