just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
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