hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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