If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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