I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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