its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Randomize
