i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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