So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
