let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
