If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
