he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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