I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
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