i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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