help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
