Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
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