How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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