im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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