tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
