So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize