I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
