if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
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