So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
