so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
