Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
