LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
