Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
